Happy Festivus

Christmas. It's a big deal...apparently. Every year, the only consistent things that I can rely on at Christmas time are 1. food, 2. presents and 3. a lot of loud relatives. This year was rather rough for my family. You see, the oldest generation of the family is dropping off like flies, may they rest in peace. This year we lost my grandfather, Richard Landry, and my wonderful aunt, Marilyn Ramsey.

Now, while normal people would see the holidays as a depressing time with such a loss, my family is not normal. When life gives us lemons, we throw them out and drink beer instead. While wearing viking hats. Literally, the Adams Annual Christmas Photo was taken with viking helmets. See for yourself.



I took the liberty to also add a didjeridoo to the picture. It adds character.

Anyway, on to some of my personal favorite quotes from Christmas.

We'll start with Christmas Eve. The entire family (30 people or less...I really can't remember) got together for a group picture. My Aunt Carol was taking the picture.
Aunt Carol: "Well, aren't we a good-looking family!"
My intoxicated father: "DAMN STRAIGHT!"
My openly gay cousin, Princess David: "Well...not straight..."
Me and my cousin Chris simultaneously: "IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE HE'S GAY!"

And who can forget Christmas day, when we're all sitting in front of the TV watching Mariah Carey sing "All I Want For Christmas is You" and my Uncle blurts out (while sitting next to his daughter/my cousin) "She looked better in Playboy."

Basically, what I'm saying is, I love my family. Even on Christmas.

Shit my family says.

So the family room TV has been broken for...so long that I can't even remember. After countless attempts to fix it, the burning smell and the alien picture it produced finally moved my parents to go out and purchase a new one.

A couple of days ago while I was out grocery shopping with my father, he got a call that the television we were supposed to be getting (a 60-inch) had broken, so they were offering us a discounted 65-inch. After this call, my father and I made a trip to Conn's to check out the 65-inch.

"That looks awful big...too big if you ask me," my dad said, then looked at me for approval on his comment.
"Well, Dad, I've never been one to believe in 'too big' if you know what I mean."
He stared at me for a moment in disapproval, then shook his head because he knew it wouldn't phase me. He disregarded my comment and told the salesman that we'd just take the floor model of the 60-inch television. I really did want the larger TV. It was pretty.

Well, today our new TV was delivered, and my dad just set it up on it's stand. As my mother, my father, and I stare at it in awe, my mom looks over at me and asks, "Can you see it?"...I didn't know quite how to respond to this. If my mother had thought I was blind, she should have put me in a special school a long time ago.

However, I responded, "Well, I could definitely use an extra five inches."
Without a single hesitation, my mother was quick to reply "That's what she said."

No one can ever ask me where I get it from. Ever again.